Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Disturbing and Disjointed

The dream opened sometime at midday I assume, with myself and the general populace of my band (I'm in a High School marching band)and I working to basically restore this old building to a usable condition. I can't remember exactly why we needed to restore this place, but it seems to me now that it was going to be used as a place of meeting. I had arrived somewhat late and most everyone else was busy with some task or other. I entered the building, exchanging simple pleasantries with friends and acquaintances as I went.

Upon entering the building, I noted that the overall atmosphere was dreary.. It actually reminded me of one huge basement, but it had an upstairs and a downstairs to it. Lighting there was generally dim, consisting mostly of those lightbulbs in the single light socket with the pull cord.

Despite the unpleasing conditions, I was at ease.. At least until I took the full magnitude of the scene around me. Every corner, every wall, and generally every space in view was occupied by a spider. They existed in every form, shape, and size imaginable. There was no distinct genre or species. I immediately didn't like the place any more.. Mostly due to the fact that I've harbored a dread of spiders and all their like for as long as I can remember. I managed to keep my wits about me and remain at least semi-calm and moved to assist a friend of mine with some random task.. Always wary of the spiders that surrounded me.

At some point, as I was carrying a box full of a bunch of junk to the second floor, I stopped to say hi to a group of friends that had congregated nearby. One of them, a girl I've never been all that crazy about, was holding this bound leather book. I immediately assumed that it was a journal of some kind. She said she'd found it somewhere and I offered to keep it for her until later She agreed. I continued to work throughout the day, and eventually went home. I realized only when I arrived that I had forgotten to give the journal back to her. Since I had it, I decided to read some of it. I opened it, and found a series of newspaper clippings inside the cover. I don't recall their significance at the moment, but they were all somehow related.

While I puzzled over the clippings, I neglected to notice the entry of someone else into the room. The person made their prescence known, and I looked over to see that it was a girl I've known since middle school. I've never liked her much.. She has a tendency even now to be an extreme annoyance, but I've always tried to remain civil to her nonetheless. We exchanged greeting as is customary. She then surprised me by asking if she could stay at my house that night. I agreed, seeing no harm in it.. Surely I had the patience and restraint to deal with the situation. I placed the journal on my dresser, and readied myself for sleep.

At all odd times during the night, I was awoken by the sound of water running inside my closet. I thought it odd, but ignored it at the time.. Being very intent upon sleep. The next morning, I awoke again to the sound of the water running in my closet. I saw the girl standing in my doorway staring blankly, and decided to ask her if she heard the water too. She gave me this very chilling and somehow empty look and said something like, "I don't hear it, but I know you do." She was completely freaking me out.. I continued to ask her questions and she continued to reply in riddles and in the same dull, chilling manner.

I was really scared by now, and screamed "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?" before kicking her as hard as I could. She doubled for a moment, then kicked me back.. I didn't feel it. Despite the fact that she was over twice my size, I was able to grab her and throw her to the floor. She disappeared a moment later. This is the first time I have ever assaulted anyone physically out of fear/anger in any of my dreams.

Still scared and very confused, I walked outside where a parade was going on. There was a woman on a ground crying, a number of other people had gathered around her. I ran over, and saw a dead baby on the ground. Apparently this woman had been walking in the parade, dropped the child, and it had been trampled by a horse and several other people.

Events like this have been recurring in my dreams lately.. Babies dying and such.. Any information you can give me on why I'd be having such disturbing dreams would be appreciated..

No name given

Good morning, dreamer.

I would like to point out for everyone's benefit that I don't need your real name to translate dreams for you, but it is nice to know what to call you by. That's why I ask for a "pen name" in my form. Also, you're not required to give me an email address, but if you want a direct reply then it does become somewhat necessary. On with the dream.

Restoration of a building becomes easier to translate when we see what the building will be used for. In your dream, it is for a meeting place. So this becomes a restoration of communications, most likely with a peer. The dreary atmosphere, then, is a reflection of the current state of communications, which seem to be very poor at the moment.

The spiders are not exactly hidden, but are not obvious until your closer inspection. The important thing to remember here is how you feel about spiders. They inspire dread - I use your word because it's an important distinction here. A strong feeling of dread is associated with this attempt at rebuilding communications. You feel surrounded and ill-at-ease in this situation.

But you do seem to get some information, in the form of the journal. Because you dont' recall specifics, we can conclude that they aren't all that important. What is significant is the fact that you got it in confidence from someone else. You don't set out to betray this confidence, but it happens anyway - not with any malificent intent, you just snoop a bit. The inspiration for this dream symbol may be some small guilt feelings, over some equally innocuous situation.

The girl who invites herself for the night is akin to a Trojan Horse - a seemingly minor annoyance which turns out to be something much more threatening - or at least much more annoying - than it seems at first. Again, we must pay attention to the emotions involved. You believe that you can control yourself, but as it turns out, you cannot, because you underestimate the extent of the problem.

But this situation is a bit more complex than that. Water is nearly always emotional in nature, a fact which I find interesting because no one consciously teaches it to us. To hear water running in a closet means that you are becoming dimly aware of emotions that are hidden deep inside of yourself. You don't investigate because you are intent upon sleep - you don't want to know about these emotions. You are trying to ignore them. But eventually the sound wakes you up, so you are aware that you cannot ignore how you feel indefinitely.

Your overnight guest, at this point, is a part of yourself, actually. My guess is that she's a representation of your own subconscious, which cannot answer questions except in riddles, and doesn't always feel what your conscious mind feels. During your fight, neither of you is really able to harm the other, but you are able to banish her from your room - again, a way of not thinking about something which scares you. Since this kind of thing has never happened to you before, I'd assume that the underlying fear is also something relatively new.

I think that your parade is a clue to the nature of your fear. A parade is a public display, generally of something positive. Your dream parade turns tragic with the death of the baby - something very helpless and vulerable. Ultimately it was the carelessness of the woman that caused the death, too wrapped up in the public display to watch out for her charge.

The picture I'm getting here, is that you are wanting to patch things up with someone that you used to be close to. You have a history with this person, but may have allowed things to drift apart. You have very deep feelings for this person, but are afraid to let them show, because you fear getting hurt. You feel that things could go wrong at any moment, and that maybe you are letting yourself in for more than you can handle.

Without knowing more about your personal situation, I can't offer any advice on how to proceed - except, perhaps, carefully. I note that the spiders never attacked you, but the baby was dropped - so perhaps, disaster can be avoided, but you will need to exercise caution.

Pleasant dreams,

Peregrin

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